Monday, 8 February 2010


this blog is for my good friend egg. she's a cute bitch and it's definitely NOT HER BIRTHDAY OR ANYFINK. (she really likes JLS; i was going to get tickets but this will have to do).

in the library the other day my mate turnip said that JLS were the ONLY boyband at the moment. i reckon she's right.

first though, WHAT IS A BOYBAND?

some definitions:

boyband - some guys who got together possibly in a gay way to start with, who then realised they weren't really gay. they just really liked singing and dancing. no bumming for dem fanks. (eg. takethat, 911)

BOYband - some guys who got together because they really just liked singing and dancing to start with. only to realise they actually enjoyed being v.v. close to other males in a very intimate finger-up-the-bum style. they will be up for bumming. (eg. backstreet boys, n'sync)

boyBAND - these guys are into rock and roll. or something. one or two might sing, but the rest play instruments and do not dance. they jump around the stage in a v. shit way. (eg. busted, mcfly)

BOYBAND - total all out fags. probably not even signed to a major label. probably just the contents of any given gay bar howling away on kareoke to lady gaga. NOTAFAGORANYTHING

note: if any of the above are irish, they will be managed by louis walsh. who, regardless of their sexual orientation, will make sure they include him at some point in their fun&games. here's a picture of what he doesn't want to happen DEBLARNEYSTONE

thankfully JLS escaped louis walsh. and made this video riiiiiight?


it's about time we had an all black boyband (don't care if there are others, i've not heard of them. point them out to me. if they weren't on the x-factur i don't care).

obama would endorse them i guess.

and they're so popular with the ladies.

boybands (espesh JLS) breed feminism through the objectification of the male body. which is something i'm always willing to perpetuate. just look at how JLS (who used to be called UFO. doubleyouteaeff?!!) have to perform dance moves and get sweaty on a stage whilst ravenous cock-hounds bide their time on the sidelines. JLS are a bit like cattle in that respect. only with better dance moves and a stylist who went OTT at all saints.

although i do like a man in a vest. SPUNKONTHAT

basically i like looking at men with hot bodies. whilst it's true that there's only one (marvin! ZOMG) i'd bang, the rest are alright too. especially that cute little one. i'd totally eat him first.

whatever happened to one true voice?! GOODVIDEO.

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