taylor skiwiffed & gothic doubling

do we let taylor finish?

before we begin, i really thought

taylor was wearing a t-shirt that said "junior jews" (0:12). it actually says "junior jewels" but some of the more cynical amongst us would ask:

"WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE?" lolzomg

setting your foul anti-semitism aside, let's talk about difference. let's talk about spotting the difference.

the differences between:

blonde taylor

&

brunette taylor

in this accidental (?) example of gothic doubling and split-personality presented in the form of swift's video for 'you belong with me'.

in that defonotmisogynist idea of the virgin & the whore as the only types of women available to mankind, blonde taylor is, as one would have guessed, the "virgin".

there she wiles away the hours in her bedroom having fits (0:52). presumably this is coz she doesn't have internet access and therfore cannot watch porn or facebook the guy she likes.

(seriously. why are they showing eachother supergay little messages on paper? is it coz they're white? why not show them texting eachother or poking each other on facebuk? is this the 50s? are they going to tell calpurnia to cook their supper DARN TOOTIN'. gawd, why is taylor so racist? is it the kanye thing? he doesn't speak for all black folk taylor. lighten up)

blonde taylor is an example of the "she's all that" girl. if you haven't seen the film.....i dunno what to suggest. basically this girl is all 'different' and stuff. she listens to female singer songwriters and ALL THE SONGS ARE ABOUT HER. ALL OF THEM. she reads too, because you know, boys are secondary to studying. learning is fun etc. etc. "fashion isn't important" and shit like that. think anne hathaway in the beginning of 'the devil wears prada'.

taylor subvertstheform a little bit here; she does like 'one special guy'. (take that to read, the obv gay guy who just "respects" ladies too much to fuck them. VOM). but she really "gets" him you know?

brunette taylor is just a slutty bitch who couldn't give a shit about him. she's only dating him because he's the hottest guy in school. who cares if he likes to lap up spunk? she's not fucking him anyway. she's cheating on him with shane oman. (fanksmeangirls).

either way lead gayboy ends up ditching slag-taylor in favour of the 'she's all that'-taylor. little does she know that he wont want to fuck her either when he goes away to college and begins 'experimenting' with his room mate (ITSDEFINITELYNOTGAYWITHTHELIGHTSOFF!). so she'll have to resort to....yup...fucking shane oman and dying her hair brunette.

circle of life friends. disney never put it better.

and after all that, kanye west will STILL be a douche. YAY

also: pledge some money to haiti you curmudgeon.yeahthereyougo